Day: April 8, 2017

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Your death is inevitable. You are a fleshy bag of meat and bones with just a few pounds of pressure in just the wrong place all that’s needed to permanently erase you from existence. But did you know that there are many things that could kill you right now in the supposed safety of your own home? It’s true. Meteorites, toilets and toddlers are all out to get you, as are a bunch of other things you’d never even think of. So let’s find out what’s gonna make your friends and family all teary-eyed, in our list of ten things that could kill you right now.

Imagine waking up one morning to see a large hole in your roof. That definitely wasn’t like that last night; I wonder where it came from? You turn to your wife for an answer. But something’s not quite right. She has a giant smouldering mess of pulp and bone where her face used to be. That definitely wasn’t like that last night.

Gamma Ray Bursts are hugely energetic space explosions that produce gamma radiation in gigantic quantities, and if one were to strike the Earth it could kill every last one of us in less time than it takes me to decide if I want cheese on something.

Are you eating while watching Strange Mysteries? I hope not, because choking is the fourth leading cause of unintentional injury death, with most cases involving some sort of food or chunky beverage – like skittlebrau, or vomit. Your average chance of choking to death is one in 4,404, with someone in the USA dying from throat nonsense every two hours

Are firearms legal in your country? Then make sure you’re packing one yourself, because someone is coming for you and everyone you love. It’s not terrorists, and it’s not the government, no…it’s toddlers.

Heart disease is the world’s number one killer, with 17.3 million people clutching frantically at their ticker and collapsing dead every single year. But what is the most common cause of heart disease? Is it smoking? Eating too much fatty food? Letting your mom use your laptop when you’re only 50% certain you’ve closed all your browser tabs?

Are you watching us from a pillowy fortess of duvet-based slumber paradise? Then be careful as you get out, because every year 450 Americans die from falling out of bed. This figure can be compared to a total of zero Americans killed each year by foreign nationals coming from the countries affected by Donald Trump’s travel ban, but do we see the rampant bed menace tackled?

Are you on prescription drugs at the moment? Well I sure hope your Doctor has great penmanship, because in the USA alone 7,000 people are killed annually due to unreadable prescriptions. Such confusion often leads to an accidental overdose, so the next time you get a script that looks a little bit like this…

At some point in their lives, approximately 1.5 to 3 percent of all people either have or will develop a brain aneurysm, and while most are entirely symptomless, a ruptured aneurysm is fatal in 40% of all cases.

Carbon Monoxide is an odourless, colourless and tasteless gas, and because of its subtle, undetectable nature it remains responsible for around half of all fatal poisonings in most countries.

Are you desperately waiting for this video to end because you really need to pee? Well clearly you’ve never heard of the pause button, dingus, but don’t go rushing off to play with the yellow lightsaber just yet, because draining the weasel might actually kill you.